Feed Me!!!

Last night was a very very very hard night for Mr. Logan, basically the day came where his tummy started "turning back on" after his surgery and this kid was less than amused about being hungry without the okay from the surgeon to be able to eat. He would chew on his pacifier like he was going to bite a hole in it. (Apparently they started hiding in his crib because when I got there this morning I rounded them up :)

Me ie "the milk lady" holding him really ticked him off, like smelling bacon cooking when you are supposed to be fasting. Poor kid. The nurses said he only slept in 20 minute spurts before waking up in search of food. The neonatologist finally approved the poor little guy to be sedated until the surgeon could come in and take a look at him. Sure enough he took a look and declared that the nurse could start giving the hungry guy "some Big Mac's" or in other words Mommy's Milk. 

They have to initially insert it down his nose in tiny increments to monitor how he handles it. As soon as the good stuff hit his stomach he was a happy boy. Sadly the amount was sooo little only an ounce. Within an hour he was crying for more, too bad they have to start him on a three hour schedule for monitoring of his digestion. Oh man it will be another long night for my hungry little boy. We pray he handles them well and that they can keep feeding him more and more. 

Good Days :)

Logan just chilling with a pacifier (obviously only exciting to the baby hungry and Logan's parents :)

Mr. B visiting Logan, he showed more interest than before but it is clearly an experience that goes over his head. 

One thing Mr. B did like was Grandpa getting to hold Logan, this meant that he (the B.) actually got touch his baby brother. He was soft and thought it was really cool (for about 5 seconds). We love our boys and are so excited that both are doing well.  Mr. Logan is continuing to heal well, and his big brother is continuing to enjoy the excitement all around.  We pray that Logan's organs will start working quickly and that he can get off his stomach vent and begin eating. Thank you so much for all your love and support. 

One Step Forward Two Steps Back

Wednesday morning the Pediatric surgeon (filling in for the surgeon who did his Saturday surgery) came by and found everything healing well and was very positive that Little L. could eat any day now and be out in a few weeks tops.

Come Thursday morning the Neonatolgist notices that the stoma site (where his colostomy bag attaches) was turning black (not a good color obviously, they say the color of the inside of the mouth is best). The Surgeon assured her that to some degree that can still be normal, the piece that turns black can fall off like an umbilical cord and it still heals. He said as long as Logan is pees, breathes and does not run a fever and has a white blood cell count that all is fine.

Well fast forward this morning and at 7 am the surgeon personally called me (they operate on the no news is good news philosophy so I was not looking forward to what he said. He said thinking about Logan had kept him up last night and he was impressed that revision surgery was needed despite how well Logan appeared to be doing on the outside. We trusted him and rightly so because when they did the surgery it showed to have been a very necessary thing, and because he was not sick or in a compromised condition he will still be able to handle the recovery.

Unfortunately this means we are in the same place as last week, coming out of surgery, back on a ventilator, unable to hold him, dealing with pain management issues and waiting for his tummy to be ready to accept food again, but that is just how it works in the medical realm.

We feel so lucky for Logan to be in such good hands and that Mr. B continues to be taken care of by family and friends who love and care about him. Thank you so much for your prayers.

Hanging at the Hospital

Mr. L was doing super well after being taken off the ventilator. He also super enjoyed not having a tummy venting tube as well. We feel so blessed that he woke up right as we got to the hospital. Best part of all is we got to hold him (as you may have read on facebook). We are still praying for his intestines and other digestive organs to start working again (they usually go dormant for awhile after surgery).  They have also started weaning him off Morphine, and we pray that he will be able to handle the transition smoothly and quickly. Poor little guy, such a trooper.

Big brother and I got to chillax at home yesterday just the two of us. He was adorable, but a little sad that it meant me taking him away from a friend's house. Once he got over that we had fun :) Although an unintentional game of hide and go seek had me concerned when I walked around asking what he was doing the iconic toddler "NOOOO" response gave away his location. (Pardon the terrible phone pictures).  

We are sooooo proud of him for handling everything so well. He is definitely more prone to temper tantrums and stuff, but we love him and could not have asked for a better big brother for this. He is happy to play with either grandma or any friend's house as we go to spend time with Logan. This whole thing would certainly have been miserable if we were having constantly worry about who was watching Mr. B. 

At this time we are largely trying to keep Mr. B at home in the afternoon and evenings, but he loves play dates in the pre-1pm nap time hours as long as NOBODY in the household is sick or has been sick recently. Thank you so much for all the offers to watch him (we will definitely 

take you up on them over time). 

As for me I would love company at the hospital, G. and I are there multiple times over the course of the day, and as long as you and nobody in your household are sick we would welcome your visit, they are very encouraging to us. 

Baby Hoden: Hours 1-30 :)

We arrived at the hospital at 7 am. The morning was so beautiful, we drove just as the sun was rising up and over the mountains. We checked in and a nurse came in and told us how excited she was for us because of the nurse we had been assigned. She told us our nurse not only delivered her (that nurse's) first child but had also helped delivered her :) Her name is Annette and man what a cool lady we instantly loved her (I did not like my nurse with Mr. B so this was a massive improvement starting out).

She took my medical history (pretty squiky clean) and was incredibly impressed but I warned her my low blood pressure had been a problem with Mr. B's delivery and she she started me on fluids immediately. She had an adorable BYU nursing student who we also loved, she along with her instructor did my IV which sadly took about 3 tries (also better than with Mr. B).

After the fluids we opted for an epidural before the contractions got intense. The anesthesiologist was really careful with his placement but it sadly took 6 pokes to get it in place. My back looks like a dart board :) He got it placed right as the contractions got painful. Then we waited, and two hours later my Midwife checked me and since I had made no progress we opted to have her break my water. That certainly got the show on the road and within about 2 hours I was ready to push.

The darling med student had never witnessed a birth so even though she got to go home at 1pm she decided to stay upon hearing I was ready to go :) The little man was in sideways (his head) so my Midwife, and my nurse helped me push gently so the man could make his grand entrance, and less than a half hour later the little man was on my chest all snugly and happily eating. We were instantly in love, little baby Hoden came at 1:25pm weighing 7 lb 15 oz, 20 inch long with a perfect double chin.

He ate for another hour after they did all of his newborn testing, and happily sucked on a binky the rest of the afternoon. We kept trying to feed him after that and every time he refused, got very angry and then was soothed by being held. He is so calm and so easy going. The poor kid started spitting up amniotic fluid and seemed really gassy Sadly he kept refusing to eat. The nurse started me pumping and we tried to feed him by syringe but he could not keep anything down. We grew concerned talked to the pediatrician who told us to be patient and just enjoy holding and loving him. Which we did :) and we are so blessed for that opportunity. Our time with him was so incredibly special, a true slice of heaven.

At 9 pm on Friday night our pediatrician did an x ray and found an intestinal blockage and told us he would need to be immediately transferred to a bigger hospital for surgery asap. I was discharged at midnight, no wheel chair, no send off and worst of all no baby :(

He ended up getting more testing and had surgery the next afternoon where they learned the blockage was a severe atresia (gap in the intestine or bowel). They could not repair it so he was given a colostomy bag that will remain in place until he is about 6 months old and the gap can be repaired. He will remain in the NICU until he recovers from surgery and learns to eat. We love him so much and have witnessed such an outpouring of love and support for family and for which we are incredibly thankful. Thank you so much for caring about us.

Baby Day

Helping mommy get ready for little brother

This morning I woke up at 1 am, a little earlier than my usual 3 am bathroom trip. Ahh the joys of being 9 months pregnant. I was able to go back to sleep for another hour, and again had to pee. This time when I laid down I could not get comfortable (shocker). I played around with pillows etc, but between a violently active unborn child and frequent mildly painful contractions I was simply unable to get back to sleep. So at 3:30 I gave up, and started cleaning my house (its already pretty freaking clean), folded and put away diapers and ate something since I was starving.

39 weeks

Well those lovely contractions are not going away and so we will be heading the hospital. Coincidentally we had set up an induction with my midwife for 7am. She and I felt pretty good about it in the baby is doing awesome, and I am already 4cm, effaced, and otherwise ready to go (my due date is the 15th). I feel so incredibly blessed to be getting a "get out of jail free" card so to speak. Having never experienced the torture of being 40 plus weeks pregnant.

I cannot begin to describe how blessed I have been. I know so many women who struggle with sickness that far far surpassed my own brief stint of morning sickness. Women who rather than having a short 10 week bout of pelvic pain are unable to walk, roll over etc without excruciating pain. Likewise I know women who gain uncomfortable amounts of water weight and struggle to fit into any clothes and have trouble  moving, whereas I caught myself whining that my pre-pregnancy jeans stopped buttoning this week (don't worry I don't thing I am big, I was just sad to not have something other than sweats to wear).

I have a wonderful husband and adorable two year old, as well as an extended family who loves and cares for me. I cannot wait to bring another little boy into my wonderful family. I cannot thank God enough for all he has given me, I pray that all goes well today and that pretty soon we have pictures and happy stories to share :).

Last night out as a party of 3 :)

Almost There

After Mr. B's birthday it became a little hard to mentally process the idea of being pregnant in the month of August :) We coped marvelously by taking frequent trips to the water park. We discovered that Mr. B is a die hard water slide fan. He will go down even the scariest of tube slides on his daddy's lap. Being pregnant and such I obviously could not go down with them but I was able to watch and cheer them on. Even if the little guy was scared at any point he would bob up out of the water at the bottom and soon be saying "gain, gain" or "more, more" oh man we love that little boy.

But sometimes summer fun just gets exhausting :)

In other news I learned first hand that quiet does not mean clean :) Hurray for spreading juice in your left over ketcup.

Little man number 2 is still growing every day. Despite the concerns expressed to my mother, if anyone would like to know I really have gained 30 pounds (bet you can't guess where its stashed :) and am healthy as a horse. I feel incredibly blessed, I am not taking this for granted one bit. 38.5 weeks and counting

If you can ignore the little loose thread :) then I am happy to show the sling I made, not to sell or give away but for my very own little man. This thing is made of the new fabric tencel I keep raving about and I am dying to get to snuggle my little newborn in it.

Also as far as baby stuff we put together our new double stroller (thank you family) and Mr. B would not get out of it, he keep saying "ride, ride" over and over again. So cute.